Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Forgiveness is hard

So recently an event happened that really hurt my feelings. I felt stabbed in the back, attacked, and told things I don't believe to be true. I lost some respect for these people and am finding it hard to trust them again. But as I am going through this I am trying to think of why they may have done what they did. It doesn't make it right, but that doesn't mean I still can't show them love.

This is the first time in my life I have truly felt offended. I now have a better understanding of how those who get offended have a hard time letting it go. But I don't want to end up that way. I don't want relationships ruined over one misunderstanding where they didn't have the whole picture and have not lived through what I have. So I began my search of the scriptures and the Ensign, and have been praying, A LOT! I know that the Lord wants me to forgive these people and show them love. This hasn't really been an issue before. I have always been quick to forgive, but this had cut me so deep that I have struggled. I read a talk in the Ensign and came upon this quote from the prophet George Albert Smith;

"May we have the Spirit of the Master dwelling within us, that we may forgive all men as He has commanded, forgive, not only with our lips but in the very depths of our hearts, every trespass that may have been committed against us."

As I read this I realized that even though I think they need to apologize, I may never get one, and I don't need one. I need to forgive them and love them no matter what. And what is going to help me forgive them is to serve them, and maybe through my actions they might see what my life is really like, and what I really believe. And maybe it will clear things up, and maybe it won't. But I refuse to fill my heart with hate and resentment. I want to love them and have a great relationship.

I may be struggling still with this, and may still hurt, but I know what I need to do. I know that the atonement of Christ will help me with this. I need to bring my heart to Him and He will help me through this. I am not alone, the Lord is here to help me.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Duluth and Thomas the train

Saturday my mom took us all on a very fun trip to Duluth. Mainly to see Thomas the Train. you better believe that Tristan was jumping up and down excited. All morning he could hardly wait to go. We rented a mini van and headed out.
On the way up we had to stop at Tobie's and get some pastries. They were very good. I love the maple fried doughnut. I could have eaten 10 of them. But trying to not spoil my whole diet, I only ate half (but then later ate a whole Cinnamon roll, so I guess the self control went out the window).

Once we arrived at Northshore Railroad, Tristan was ready to see Thomas. He wanted to see everything. He kept screaming, "railroad tracks, near near" (apparently that's the sound the gates make when they lower). Once he saw Thomas he ran to get on. Couldn't even get a picture of him. The pictures will show our time on the train and at the train station. When it got towards nap time, he wasn't very thrilled with picture taking. Oh and he was afraid of Sir Topham Hat because he was a fuzz. I was a little sad i didn't get a picture with him. we waited a half hour to get his picture with him and watched a magic show and a funny children's song band. Too bad Tristan was too shy to dance and really doesn't like kids songs. He likes the Muse. I know, bad parenting.  ANYWAYS, to the photos.

After we said out goodbyes to Thomas, we headed to Canal park by the life bridge. Here are the pictures i took there.

 right after this photo a wave crashed over and got Jordan wet. Too bad i didn't catch that one.
 waves coming over the wall

 me and mom

 we all slid down the rail

 so handsome

 my little bug
 Jordan running up the wall

Bella showing off her flexibility

We had a great day in Duluth and can't wait to go back. Thanks again mom for the fun trip!